We are family
by Anna974
Summary: Accompany Hailey as she faces the aftermath of Jay's shooting with a little help from the team and Will.
1. Chapter 1

Hailey was still biting her nails, pacing back and forth in the Med's waiting room when she spotted Will making his way to her. Although he had rightfully appeared incommensurably distraught when they had brought Jay in a few hours prior, he had refused for any other volunteering colleague to practice the imperative surgery on his brother's critical wound. Ambushed by the urgency of the situation and the waves of shock engulfing him, he had not been able to ask for more than the basic questions he would for any other patients. Then, with Natalie impulsively assisting him, they rushed into the closest operating room he made sure was available and had not manifested himself ever since.

As he came to her level, she noticed his whole body and facial expressions changing from being a skilled and confident doctor to a broken brother in great distress. She also caught a glimpse of a worried and sorrowful Natalie standing in the background as a subplot figurant, dossier in hand, who regretfully chose to take the opposite direction albeit she had no clue why.

His whole face was mirroring hers: Livid. Drained. With bloodshot eyes. A long face reflecting a heavy heart. He couldn't even find the energy to offer a curtesy smile, he was trembling, indicating he would break down any second. He now could barely stand on his two feet, the adrenaline unmistakably wearing off and reality striking like a bolt of lightning.

This alarmed Hailey more than she could ever display as her wild and dark imagination supplanted the optimism and faith she had held all along. Her heart and mind were fiercely battling inside and she found herself torn as an entity. The former was racing and shrieking that it was unthinkable to even consider the universe could be cruel enough to put her through that kind of tragedy. Twice. The latter on the other hand, was reporting that sometimes the odds were never in your favor.

Will found a seat and hunched up to allow himself to let go, putting his head in his hands, tears streaming down his face. Tears escalated into sobs as Hailey, nonetheless still dreading the worse case scenario, crouched down and took him in her arms, unable to stop herself from bursting into tears either.

This instant, Will felt like family and lending him a shoulder to cry on felt to be the right thing to do. One thing was for certain: no matter how well or not they knew each other or how long it had been since their last encounter, they would always have the richest and most binding thing in common: the vehemence of their love for Jay.

She absorbed that seeing his brother unusually defenseless and battered must have been grief-stricken except she was only praying that his breaking down solely meant processing the current events and taking his emotions into account.

"How is Jay?" She finally dared to enquire, grossly wiping away the flood of tears on her face. He did the same before attempting to collect himself as a reminder he was still hanging around his workplace. Both of them stood up simultaneously, facing the other one.

"Thank you. I needed that." She nodded silently, putting a hand on his arm and squeezing it lightly. She had given him the space he desperately longed to vent but she remained anxious to know more about Jay's condition.

Sensing her despair, he pursued:

"We've stabilized him," he reassured her first. Her reaction was not long in coming as a crucial and interminable sigh of relief escaped her. She bent down, putting her hands on her upper legs as more uncontrollable tears kept soaking up her face.

"We tended to the numerous injuries on his body and face: scratches, bruises and hematoma. He also suffers from a head trauma due to the severe attack on the back of his head. He was probably knocked down with a metal bar to be honest. The bullet wound though tricky, did not reach any vital organs."

He paused, not with the intention of coming across as dramatic but he simply had an urgent need of catching his breath after experiencing such a close call. The victim was not unidentified: he had been performing surgery on his own flesh and blood, his only family left. Enumerating his brother's injuries was no pleasure cruise therefore he breathed in and mastered the courage necessary to carry on,

"We've managed to extract the bullet and close the wound. It did a lot of physical damage but I believe everything will be alright. We just have to be patient." After filling Hailey on the details, he noticed there were probably two words she had only just picked up: stabilize and patient.

"Wait for what?" She questioned, running short of poise.

"We just have to wait for him to wake up. Because with time, he'll recuperate just fine. But I'm telling you like it is, there is a long road ahead." Nevertheless, Hailey offered a genuine smile for the first time in days at those encouraging words from Will and he allowed himself to mimic her. All Jay had to do was hang in there for everyone.

"When is that going to be?" She tried to fish for more details while currently expecting the limits of medicine and what Will unquestionably had no power over.

"Whenever he decides to." He admitted, currently as helpless as she was.

She chuckled, knowing Jay would make them suffer until he had laughed his head off. Will gave her a curious look but she dismissed it with her hand, not appealing enough to explain how his brother liked to drive everyone crazy when he was in the best position to know that.

"Can I see him?" She asked, her eyes and voice pleading.

There was an urgent need to be around his corner and catch sight of the extent of his condition. She wanted to be in close proximity as every improving minute was going by thus incapable of imagining being anywhere else when he would open his eyes at last. For he was only permitted to rise from the ashes, as he had perpetually and formerly done.

"Very soon, I promise."

"Where is the rest of the team?" Will finally took a look around and puzzlement crept upon his face as they had all come barging in as a team earlier. He was familiar with how tight the unit was and for that reason, he had not expected for her to wait all alone.

"Probably ambushing Angela in her room, I don't know. I'm trying not to think about it too much and let Voight handle this because I know I will do something I'll regret if I come across her." She stated, getting agitated once again.

Concern and care were traded with anger and resentment as she passed a hand through her now loosened yet messy undulated blond hair.

"What happened Hailey?" His eyes were growing wide and then it hit her. He had no idea what had actually transpired and that made her stop dead in her tracks. She mentioned for them to sit down and though not enchanted by the idea of reliving these past weeks' events, she was the only one at liberty or fit for bringing him insight on his brother's mindset and the dreadful turn of events that ensued.

"Have you heard about Marcus West?" She tested the waters to be cognizant of where to start and he contented with shaking his head.

"I'll keep it concise. Jay has been blaming himself for the death of a guy in county named Marcus West. Because of a deficient facial recognition software, Marcus was wrongfully accused of savagely killing two teenage boys and it turned out he was innocent."

"What does it have to do with Jay?" He inquired ingenuously.

"Because he had been the one to tackle the case and had treated him the way you'd treat any cold-blooded murderers. He was so persuaded the guy was guilty and wanted to make the case so bad! Anyway, since Marcus' passing he has been trying to help his widow Angela and young son Bobby, with offering financial and moral support. Undercover of course."

They were both silently cursing his sense of morality and deep urge to always pick up the pieces of the damage done. They shared a grave and telling look, aware of being on the same wavelength before she stated further,

"It backfired, turns out Angela was wrapped up in some kind of drug-dealing thing. She called Jay who came to her rescue. They got kidnapped and he confessed his wrongdoing while they were held hostages." Will could not utter a single word. He was experiencing so many mixed emotions that he needed a few moments to come to terms with these information.

"He saved her from the criminals but she seized the opportunity to shoot him when he was unarmed and approaching her to tell her she was safe." She concluded, trying to fight the tears for the umpteenth time as her voice quivered and the flashbacks of his last moments in captivity became unbearable.

It was Will's turn to offer quiet comfort as he was aware Hailey had been by his side through getting shot and relieving those fresh and vivid memories was causing her physical and emotional pain. Whilst he was letting her regain control of her emotionalism, it gave him the time to sort out his own raging thoughts to proclaim,

"I get that she would feel angry about the unfairness of her husband's death. I can't also blame her for feeling resentment, even hatred towards Jay. But ending Jay's life wouldn't have brought her husband back nor would have it taken the pain away. I don't want to see her either. I don't want to have to deal with her." He declared, feeling overwhelmed and hindered.

For a few minutes there, nothing was further said. Both had no idea where to move their cursors on the specter of emotions, they were all over the place. Yet, Will was choosing to focus on the positive outcome of it all despite the terrible hardships inflicted on his brother. That's what gave him the confidence to keep on saying,

"Thank you for sharing this with me. I know how much you have on your plate now but I appreciate your dedication and altruism. I didn't know much but I've been told that your determination to find Jay was closely followed by your anger at the world." He told her putting a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it gently.

"At myself." She corrected sporting a somber long. He shot her a perplexed look and she looked down, fidgeting her hands.

"What in the hell hell did you do wrong?" He asked agape at her self-flagellation, still not grasping what her downcast demeanor connoted.

"I should have kept an eye on Jay the minute I sensed he was getting off the beaten tracks. I should have been more vigilant and listened to my instincts. Or I should have talked to Voight and none of this would have happened. Damn your brother and his good heart!" She exclaimed, virulently standing up.

Still appalled by the rage she was boomeranging at herself, he followed her and took both her hands in his while redirecting her towards her seat in an attempt to soothe her. Then he said with his softest and sincerest voice,

"He does have a good heart but he's also the most stubborn human being on the planet. Jay never listens. There's nothing else you could have done."

"But if he wakes up, that is going to change I can promise you this." She replied firmly resolved not to let anything similar ever happen to them again. Will flinched at her sentence and corrected her,

"When." He simply stated.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm just correcting your syntax. When he is going to wake up. He has no choice but to do so." Will said assuredly.

"Of course!" She retorted, cursing herself for sounding so careless.

"Thank you for what you did for my brother, Hailey." He suddenly expressed, noting that in all this madness he had omitted to concede those two simple words, at loss for any other term that would be sufficient or meaningful enough.

"I'd do anything for him." She effortlessly replied, incapable of keeping her vulnerability out of sight.

He smirked. If he had had his suspicions about Jay before, he instantly had the validation that something very intense had been occurring for a long time between the two of them.

"I think the feeling's mutual." Hailey shot him a perplexed look, as to demand how he would have knowledge of this.

"Do you remember that deadly-flesh-eating-bacteria debacle?" Will asked humorously, making light of another dreadful and disturbing event that city had brought upon them.

"How could I forget!? I was in quarantine!" She said half-jokingly, letting bygones be bygones.

"Yeah. After that ordeal, Jay and I went to Molly's to celebrate having bought more time together. We were sound and safe, once again." Will smiled at the recollection of this crowded, joyful and fun night spent talking, drinking and enjoying each other's company.

"I remember." She confirmed. Even though she had not participated in their festivities, she was always aware of his whereabouts.

"Of course you do." He said, smirking playfully at what followed naturally from conjugality. She nudged him, clearly embarrassed by his insinuations.

"Well, we vented about it a lot that night but his uplifted mood suddenly vanished when I brought up your name." Her heart sank at the thought of her name ever being a source of discomfort for him. He moved his head from side to side, signaling she was already misinterpreting what he was trying to convey.

"Why?" She demanded then.

"Because he was feeling guilty. Because he had sent you to that place and involuntarily put you in harm's way."

He had never told her this. She remembered how distant he had been for a few days, barely acknowledging her when she got out of the hospital. She had no idea he had felt that way. Typical Jay blaming himself for something he did not have any control over.

"He couldn't have predicted that turn of events, that's part of the job."

"Exactly." He shot her a suggestive look, hinting at the perilous risks they both had to take for the good of the job, trying to ease up her guilt as well. Will kept on clarifying,

"He knew that's what you would say. But that night, he told me how ironic it was that he had been unable to protect you when you were the one to help save his life. And he also said something that has stuck with me and that is making a lot more sense now while I'm talking to you."

"Which is?" Will was still smirking, clearly enjoying her mortification at the sudden turn of their conversation when she was suppressing the urge to smack him across the face in order to wipe that smug look he was harboring.

"That he would hate this job if anything were to happen to you." She blushed profusely, presently well conscious the two brothers were somehow mentioning her when time was spent together.

She knew Will would not disclose any more and she did not want him to either. Every uncertainty haunting her she wanted answers to, in due form. In time. With Jay.

"I heard about Natalie recuperating her memory. That's such good news." She blurted out all of a sudden. She needed to feel anything but bashfulness so she thought reversing their position was a good initiative. Will cracked up but played along anyway, declaring,

"Yeah, I'm happy for her. She gets to see the world with a clear and true vision again." He verbalized sincerely but something stroke her as off, his answer almost rehearsed.

"For her? What about for you?" She pushed gently.

If he had grown to know a lot about her, she was cleverly asserting Jay had been whispering about him too. He had waited and longed for Natalie for so many years that she had expected for them to have worked things out promptly. From the look of it they had not, which explained the space she had given him after the surgery.

"I guess it's another story for another time Hailey. Right now my main focus is Jay and his well-being." He took her hand in his once again, shutting her off tenderly.

"You're right, I didn't mean to pry." He tapped her hand delicately, assuring her everything was alright before letting it go.

"Let's go, I'll take you to his room." They both stood up and he instinctively put a hand on her back as to guide her to the room Jay was resting in but she halted their movements when she turned to him to add,

"Thanks Will. I wish we could have stroke such a deep conversation under other circumstances but I'm glad we got to do this anyway." And just like that, she smiled from ear to ear.

"Likewise, Hailey." He returned her smile, both of them synchronized: grinning faces reflecting hopeful hearts.

* * *

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews on my last story! I feel like I'm only "efficient" at writing oneshots but I've got a few ideas for this one, I hope they will follow through! **

**I'd also like to share that I obviously have little knowledge on the medical line of work so bear with me, I hope everything will make sense in this story. Hope you will enjoy!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for all the kind and encouraging words, hope you'll like this one! Happy Boxing Day! :)**

* * *

She had been trying to get some rest for the better part of the day. It did not matter how uncomfortable the cantilever chair was, Will had generously disposed it at his bedside. It largely sufficed to satisfy her rudimentary need for relaxation as well as her immense craving of being near him.

In all honesty, sleep had not really been in her cards lately. She felt as if her body had not been normally responding since this past week's events and more than that, she found herself unintentionally fighting it until muscle and mental exhaustion. For every time she closed her eyes, she would face the same horrifying images - she desperately wished to erase - on a loop.

Needless to say, she had been taking care of herself at the minimum. Since his surgery, she had not been able to bring herself to go home as she was too frightened of missing his awakening or any definite progress he would make.

Vanessa had been amazing at picking up her slack both at home and at work. She was taking perfect care of the house whilst she was basically living here, bringing her clothes while she had been allowed to use the personnel's showers, and just being a supportive and reliable friend overall. It did not matter how long she had been around the unit or how much she still had to learn, she had never once regretted taking a chance on her. Vanessa had been through enough abandonment, loneliness and instability for her to be anything but warm, caring and devoted.

"It's just me bringing you coffee." She would say ironically every time she came by, having learnt the hard way it was Jay's habit to fuel her caffeinated cravings.

"That's fine for now." She would banter back, appreciating the levity of their following exchange and the way she would take her mind off of such a sordid predicament and place.

As for when Kim had been around earlier, she had been taken aback by her state of agitation when she came through the door. She had seemed elsewhere and had tried to mask her discomfort not to add distress to her plate, Hailey assumed. Yet, she had been around Kim long enough to see past that ridiculous attempt to appear clearheaded and in control.

"Kim, what's up?" Hailey questionned, out of concern regarding the ongoing nerves of her colleague. She was unconsciously pacing back and forth in the small room, making Hailey nervous and giddy.

"It's nothing Hailey, don't worry." She tried to brush it off by approaching Jay's bed and staring at his beaten face. The scratches, bruises and black eye had turned into a darker color, making him appear scary. Almost beastly.

"Of course I worry. If you're not okay, I want to know why." She pushed firmly, determined to know what had gotten her so upset.

She was not made of glass and she was sensitive of not being the only one affected by Jay's kidnapping. She never aspired to make this about her or her agony. Everybody was agitated, everybody's feelings were valid and legitimate. They had to stick together and circle the wagons.

"I went to see Angela, again." She said, purposely avoiding Hailey's stare.

"Why?" Hailey demanded, not out of indignation but disoriented by the obstinacy of her friend.

"To try and talk some sense into her. It backfired, she is like a broken record." Kim admitted, defeated.

"Meaning?"

"She doesn't care about the attempted murder charges. She wants justice for her husband by throwing all of us under the bus. She doesn't care about Voight's threats, she even talked about a press conference and selling her story to the press." She confessed, full of regrets.

"Are we really talking about justice here? Or corruption? I can't believe Jay risked everything for that greedy woman!" It was her turn to get worked up but Kim's guilty stance discouraged her from oversharing feelings of resentment again.

"Well, we all know she is still processing his death." Kim tried to reason before adding, still looking down at his face,

"I tried to bring up her son, you know."

"And?"

"She said one day, he would be proud of her for clearing his father's name." Hailey shook her head in disagreement before stating,

She is delusional. The only thing she will get out of this is his resentment for going to prison and abandoning him."

"I can think of a lot of words to describe her right now and delusional is not one of them." Kim pursued, still fuming at this woman's blinding thirst for revenge.

"She is in no state to consider all the components of the case. Well, I'm not sure it would make a difference anyway." Hailey sighed, sickened by this woman. She truly felt compassion for the horrible circumstances in which her husband died but she was aiming her rage at the wrong people.

"Voight, the rest of the team and I will figure something out, don't cloud your mind with these parasites thoughts." Kim reassured, knowing full well how tenacious and agressive the whole unit was feeling.

"Do you have any directive though?"

"To dig up as much dirt on her as we can. Voight, Kevin and Vanessa are on it as we are speaking. Nothing is off limits." Kim stated, reaffirming the team's engagement to put her where she couldn't do any harm.

"I wish I could be of some help but I-" Kim cut her off by saying,

"I know." She touched her arm gently, staring into her eyes, as Hailey picked up the profound meaning those two words held.

"Report back to me, please?" Hailey asked, taking Kim in her arms.

"Of course."

"One more question though." She said, while breaking apart from her, leaving her hands on the side of her shoulders.

"Shoot."

"Why did you go back?" She inquired out of curiosity.

"I don't know, the clock is ticking I guess and I thought I could make a difference by showing more sympathy and understanding. I thought she'd realize that fighting the unjust or, in this case, the unknown doesn't always bring strength or peace. Sometimes there is just more pain awaiting you."

"Thank you for trying anyway." Hailey offered sympathy, not wanting to see her beat herself up anymore than she should.

"Adam's here, he is going to stop by." She nodded before Kim brushed past her. Before leaving the room, she told Jay,

"See you soon, Jay. We won't let you down." A small smile emerged on Hailey's face, never expecting anything less from this family.

As Kim was leaving, Adam was on the verge of entering the room. He took a few steps back to the side, allowing her the space she needed to exit first and she caressed his arm as a sign of gratitude before they parted ways.

Hailey sat down as Adam went immediately to Jay, giving him a gentle fist bump on his right-hand mechanically resting on the same side of the bed.

"Hey buddy. Still hanging in there, I see. Kevin says "Hi", he's been working hard for you but he'll come by as soon as he can. I managed to get a hold of Antonio and he's thinking of you too. You're missed." When he finished his greetings, he turned his attention to Hailey on the opposite side of the bed, who was watching him intently.

"How are you holding up?" He asked, thoughtfully.

"As well as I can. And you?" He looked taken aback by her reciprocal preoccupation. She raised an eyebrow before she clarified,

"You people have to stop doing this. We're a family, we're all close to Jay. It's not because I'm here 24/7 that my pain is more valid than any of yours." It was his turn to mimic the eyebrow raised playfully,

"That's very noble of you to say but we're all fine with observing that you're probably the one most affected. Don't get me wrong, I concede we're all worried sick but you are…" He was trying to find the right words to get his point across but she never let him finish,

"I'm what?" She retaliated, getting defensive.

"You're like his girl." The minute he expressed these unpremeditated words, bewilderment invaded her face at his specific choice of words and bold honesty.

"There I said it." And on top of that, he was rubbing it in.

"Please! I've seen your reaction at the precinct when you smashed that mug into the sink. Jay isn't just your partner, Hailey." He asserted once more, this time with much more conviction.

"I guess I always knew. Even when you and I were a thing." They shared a telling and honest look where words were derisory.

In fact, he had known before anything even turned romantic. Her world had stopped the first time she had found him shot on the side of the road and he had always suspected she had somehow taken advantage of him to make the pain or even her feelings for him go away. Hailey noticed his unusual prolonged silence and felt the urge to justify,

"Everybody's counting chickens before they're hatched. _We_ don't even know what it is." Her pointer finger was going back and forth between Jay and her, her body reflecting her inmost thoughts. _They_ had to know before everybody intended on pressing them about it or even putting a label on it. Her internal assessment didn't discourage Adam as he continued,

"I get what you meant now when you said there was more to our story than choosing between working together or being together." There wasn't any animosity or bitterness in his voice, his comments felt like a puzzle that finally made sense, that he was finally able to resolve.

"You agreed. And now I know why too." She could see Kim chatting with Will outside the room and Adam followed her gaze before realizing what she also meant. He couldn't help the smile that grew on his face but professed something he assumed she already knew but was worth reiterating,

"I'm always here for you, you know that." A misguided attempt at saying that whatever was going on in their lives, he was only looking for her best interest in any given situation.

Touched by his affection and loyalty, she stood up and went to take him in her arms, grateful that their previous romantic connection had not deteriorated their caring and genuine friendship.

"So am I."

* * *

Though she was incommensurably appreciative of the support and the company of everyone having an aura of concern and involvement, the constant comings and goings in the room were not of service for her rest. Yet, she was optimistic: Jay could hear and feel the movements and words of encouragement from all the people who loved him.

This room was like a time capsule and it hadn't surprised her how everyone from the Fire Department and even the Med's one had come by to offer positive energy.

Will had granted her permission to camp by his side, day and night and she couldn't be more grateful to him. They had developed a strong bond, spending time sharing memories of Jay, discussing their jobs and future plans at Molly's or dinner somewhere all together.

They had done it all. Talked to him. Talked about him. Encouraging him to push through. Even praying for him. It's common knowledge that when people feel cornered or hopeless in any crucial situation, they'll sometimes resort to the one higher force they've been denying all along.

The nurses and Will had been checking on him constantly. So far, he had been healing progressively. His vitals were good even though he had lost a lot of blood.

But he was in a coma. Will had purposely avoided uttering these words at first but when the team had settled down a little bit, he had finally admitted that more than the bullet wound doing damage to his body, the coma had been induced by both the head trauma and the lack of oxygen in both his body and blood. Therefore, there had been no sign of him waking up and feeling helpless was the understatement of the century.

Still, as long as his vitals were getting better, his chances of waking up kept on also getting higher.

It had been six days since the surgery and she despairingly longed for a sign of him. Any sign of him.

Worse, every little time she had found herself alone in the room with him, she had been replaying that warehouse scene over and over again:

She had tracked him down with every fiber in her being. How the unit had moved heaven and earth for her to get to him! She had finally found him battered but alive. Her first instinct had been to touch him, to grasp the fact that he was not a mirage. And just like that, for a few seconds the world had come to a halt when he finally looked up to her. It had struck her how unsurprised he acted to see her, like he had expected all along she would come to his rescue. His faith in her had been invigorating and was sending chills down her spine as she was pondering those events.

In return, she had been dazzled by his strength. She obviously had some knowledge of him having been through some dark times during war but the kind of injuries inflicted on him and the bravery he had still possessed to make every effort to get Angela and himself out of this ordeal commanded respect and admiration.

All of a sudden, there had been this conversation she had been convinced truly happened. No words had been exchanged but she knew she had conveyed that finding him sustained more than relief. She loved him, romantic style, and she had been coming to terms with it. She believed he had told her the same, just with his eyes.

But she pined for him to wake up to clarify that. Like he needed to clarify why he would never "forget about her just fine."

After all the mixed emotions experienced lately, she was now starting to wonder if her mind was not playing a trick on her by fabricating this priceless memory.

One thing she was certain of, his instinct to protect her had been intact. He had demanded for her to stay behind while he would save Angela.

That's when everything went to hell and her world came crashing down. She had heard two gunshots and an overpowering fright cursed through her all body. There were two possible shooters: either an unidentified abductor had still been down here or it was Angela. But in both case scenarios, deep in her core, she had known Jay had been the target.

She had rushed downstairs in position to shoot in case she would come to face any danger. Instead, she had witnessed his agonizing on the floor. Angela had been in bad shape too in the background but bearing a cold-blooded and distant expression on her face. Just because she had felt justified, this woman had played God. For a split second, she had contemplated the idea of terminating her but her grip on reality had been ruled by Jay,

"Don't shoot her." He had managed to breathe out with difficulty. He had sensed her inner turmoil and even with a bullet wound, he could still read her like an open book. Angela had still been in possession of the gun when it crossed her mind how she had not even secured the place by getting it out of her reach.

Anyway, his voice had brought her back to reality and she had tended to him, calling the radio again while trying to stop him from bleeding. Her voice had been shaky but she had managed to announce,

"5021 Henry: officer down, officer down. Call an ambulance, I repeat call an ambulance."

This had felt like déjà vu, only this time, he had not been wearing any bulletproof vest. One thing came after the other, she heard a loud bang indicating Voight and Adam had managed to come through the door and she had almost fainted by the intensity of her successive emotions. And she remembered that cruel echo in her mind wondering if Jay had not cheated death one too many times.

The team took over from her as soon as they had entered the place. She just remembered how she kept pleading with him,

"Stay with me, Jay."

Until he had closed his eyes.

While she could not help but dwell on this nightmare of a day, her head resting in her hand, she did not catch sight of a perturbed Will coming into the room. He went to quickly check the life-support system Jay was attached to and perceived Hailey, lost in thought. Not having any time to spare, he broke her out of her reverie without an ounce of consideration for her emotions,

"Hailey, I need you to wait outside." He pressed her adamantly.

It took her a second too late to come to her senses and register what he had just required her to do. He had already repeated,

"Hailey please, go and wait outside!" His requirement came to pass as more agressive this time.

"What's wrong?" She panicked. He did not even acknowledge her with a furtive look in the process of something unusual catching his attention.

"Now's not the right time, we'll talk later." He stated, almost pushing her out the door and paging for assistance.


	3. Chapter 3

**Long overdue! Not sure if still relevant but hope you will enjoy anyway. Hope everyone is safe and okay x**

* * *

In the twinkling of an eye, she was back to feeling like she did a week ago: In the dark. Psychotic. Alone. Anxious. Helpless. Just _so_ helpless.

She was exercising the art of patience as well as she could, being respectful of the fury of the universe even when she had a hard time understanding it. She kept on imagining what good would transpire if she was to let go of any emotion other than patience, yet each time, she came up with no serving answer.

In reality, she had not even been waiting that long. Sometimes the unknown was bliss, right? Any unwanted knowledge regarding why they had ushered her out of that room could lead to disaster. And she was not prepared for disaster. Could you even mentally brace yourself to be at the receiving end of a shattering, life-blowing and unbearable news? Human nature did not work that way. She never thought so.

She was sitting in the same chair she was a week ago, her leg trembling up and down, fixated on the corridor she knew Will would follow at any given time to update her on Jay's condition.

She had already taken advantage of the stillness of the time to number the days she had had the privilege to know him for and recollect every single memory on the job and off. She had pictured every smile and every laugh, which had been the easiest part considering the stern and broody image he always seemed to project. She chortled at that thought because with her, he looked to be more light-hearted. More like himself. More free.

Yet underneath all the war stories, trauma and rough edges, any human being in their right mind would come to the conclusion that Jay was just a really decent guy. He was someone who could show up at your doorstep just because you wanted some company for a glass of water in the middle of the night, someone who always made sure every civilian was taking shelter from any harmful happenings on a daily basis, someone who would constantly check on you if he ever felt like a situation was getting away from you. Someone caring, protective, leading with his heart and with the purest intentions.

Listing and focusing on all the positivity he showered this world and her life with, led her to equally try and decipher the one moment where it all changed for her. How he went from someone she wanted the best working partnership with to the only one she could never do without. She had initially thought this unfortunate ordeal - or even a push from Vanessa - had been the triggering factor. She had come to the conclusion it was none of the above. There had been no grand gesture nor grand realization. It had been unexplainably and progressively oh so consuming. He had infiltrated her heart and soul with the little things, the trust, the understanding and one day, she had woken up to him being her everyday. Her everything.

Interrupting her line of thought, she perceived Will walking towards her resulting in a feeling of deja vu. His stethoscope was circling his neck but his whole expression and gait completely differed from that time, unverifying all the scenarios she had prevented her brain from making up.

"I'm really sorry for my abruptness, earlier." He began to say when he reached her, in full conscience of how he had not spared her. He was grasping the worry she must have undergone ever since.

"No, no. Is everything alright?" She dismissed his apology with her hand, already focused on the following outcome of why they rushed her out of the room.

She could not have cared less about his wrongdoing, he could not have split himself in two in that ushered moment if he had wanted to. It was impossible to deal with a patient's emergency while attempting to reassure or walk the loved ones through every step of the aspirant healing process. Hence why she decided on being compassionate and understanding. All that mattered was Jay's condition and that's exactly where she wanted Will to be efficient, objective and in full disclosure mode.

"We had to be sure and we are now. Jay has been fighting the life support machine today which means he can breathe on his own again." He stated with a growing, genuine smile on his face.

She reached for his forearms for support as she could not believe what she was hearing. He searched for her eyes, nodding frantically in agreement, certifying her mind was not playing any tricks on her.

"That's-" She stuttered the words for quite some time, before blurting out,

"That's fantastic news!" She jumped into his arms and he lifted her up, sharing her incommensurable joy. But he quickly put her down, breaking from the hug to let her know,

"It is and there's more," He paused and almost laughed at her expectant and fixed expression, "It's also a sign that he should be waking up in the next 24 to 48 hours."

She expressed her relief with a breath sound, pacing back and forth in front of Will's amused but beaming face.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you Will."

"Oh don't thank me yet. I will definitely be kicking his ass when he wakes up for being so rash. He might not recover from that one." He joked, pointing his finger at her while he was already walking away, giggling.

She echoed his laugh, the nightmare which had invited itself into their lives on the verge of being over and done with. They had accepted every part of it not to lose control or sanity and now it was finally time to move on to hopeful days. She was letting go, her uncontrollable tears vouching for that.

* * *

More and more hours had passed and she had been so restless as a result of the fortunate news that she had touched upon continually existing one step ahead from the present. For her own sound mind, she had stopped looking at her phone and prevented herself from surveilling the clock just outside his room. She had been solely focusing on him when his awakening had started with painful noises here and there.

In contrast to then, he had been whimpering and fidgeting for the better part of an hour, acting as if he was confronting a nightmare he could not wake up from. Through it all, she had been holding his hand tight, both of them had gotten really moist from the contact albeit insignificant to pinpoint, so was wiping the sweat off of his forehead as well. She had reached for Will who had told her that as long as he was not opening his eyes, he was powerless.

Holding his hand felt like a metaphor in accompanying the transition from wherever his mind and soul were to back here with her. To reality. And him actually moving and reacting to anything was already more than she could have ever hoped for a few days ago.

Jay had opened his eyes shortly after that followed by a panic attack, his grasp on reality quite vague. Whilst she had been there the whole time, she had not proceeded to wise up to his awakening not being a walk in the park. She had failed to register getting out of a coma was not synonym of getting out _without_ trauma. To put it really simply, they had told her once he had opened his eyes, everything prior to and covering the gunshot was flashing back to him. She had indeed bore witness to every torturous facial expression which she had interpreted to stand for every bad memory.

When he had become too forceful in his struggle, the personnel had gathered around him to contain, reassure, calm, test and turn his grasp on reality on as quickly and as painlessly as possible. Once again, she had been shoved to the side, unable to rejoice in the first instants of his coming back to her. She had been in the background whispering comforting words until everything had started to feel rather close to normal again.

* * *

After a phone call to Trudy Platt from Hailey, they were all assembled around him, as any tight family would at such a crucial but joyful time. Each and every one had expressed how grateful they were for him to be alive along with mercilessly teasing him with his fear of the hospital. Presiding over the unit exchanging stories from the last week and being able to crack jokes at his expense _de novo_ felt like the purest and greatest symphony to his ears. Though one thing had to be evoked in order for him to move on for good,

"Hey, do we have any news on Angela?" He addressed the elephant in the room without further notice. Typical Jay.

"I took care of it, don't worry about her." Voight interfered, patting his hand gently and reverting back to chitchatting with Trudy. He only wanted to cut the conversation short feeling Jay was not ready to think straight on the matter just yet.

"What does that mean?" Voight was omitting who he was talking to as time was being wasted since Jay would not be letting it go just like that.

"Everybody's keeping their mouths shut, that's it. I assumed you would not press charges and I convinced her it was in her and Bobby's interests to move on."

He nodded gratefully, prepared to add to it but Hailey put a hand on his arm as a silent sign that he truly could not do without letting this go. One look at her and he understood that both parties would heal their physical and psychological wounds safely, in their own time.

What a time to celebrate being given a second chance, surrounded by such caring, reliable and devoted people!

* * *

"Remember that first day we got to meet?" He asked, watching her stop at the doorstep and tilt her head uncomfortably. He was finally getting some alone time with her. He loved all these people from the 21st district to pieces, nonetheless he had craved for her presence only. His last memory - apart from the incommensurable pain of a bullet hitting his left shoulder - was of her. He could still clearly picture her running to him after what he supposed had been moving heaven and earth to track him down. The tender, silent and furtive exchange that followed was still haunting him even now.

"I'd like to forget about this embarrassing moment if you don't mind." She answered putting both her hands on her face, masking her discomfort at recalling that day.

"Embarrassing?" He was surprised at her bashfulness but managed to speak his mind, "I'd say ass-kicking." She shook her head in disapproval.

"I had heard of Voight and his cocky attitude so I fought for control and I wanted the case. But remind me why we are talking about this?"

"I was pretty much hung up on someone else at the time, I won't lie." He bluntly managed to say. She had no clue where he was going with this but nodded anyway, never having been one to ever deny his past with Erin, "But I immediately knew you were my kind of woman: confident, sassy, unapologetic." She chuckled and blushed furiously at his forwardness.

"I was just playing an overconfident me and if you valued all that, I won't complain." She said, feeling hot as her cheeks continued to redden.

"Yeah. And so beautiful too."

Silence both engulfed them as he was letting her process that information in her own time, just as she was wondering why he was so keen on interminably complimenting her. In spite of the slight discomfort they felt, both parties were registering the situation and making peace with undeniable feelings. When she had somehow recovered, she declared,

"Have you seen me? Thanks to you I have barely left this place. Brushing my teeth and taking a shower are my top beauty tips of the week." She stretched her too large burgundy sweatshirt as a testament that looking good had been the last thing on her mind this past week.

"You think you need more than that?" He asked, disbelief filling his tone.

"Come on Jay, are you delirious?" She walked towards the hospital bed and pretended to take his temperature by approaching her hand to his forehead but in a swift movement, he grabbed her arm and slid his hand in hers.

"No, I'm finally honest. I just cheated death so I'm not gonna hold back." She could not take her eyes away from their entwined hands but still nodded at his valid point. Nodding was all she seemed to be able to do robotically as he was taking her on a rollercoaster ride of emotions she had not mentally prepared to partake in. At least not under these circumstances.

"Here, at the hospital?" She wondered, raising her eyebrow. She was not the most romantic person but she still thought whatever he might confess would need a more appropriate setting than the place smelling illness, or like he almost died for that matter.

"I'll wait for the more important stuff. But where was I?" Her eyes widened at the fact he would not drop the matter which also implied he was enjoying having an edge over her.

"Oh yeah, you don't need all the makeup, high heels, mini dress or accouterments to be beautiful. You just are." He smirked and she went to punch him in the shoulder but retracted her hand when she realized she would hit his injury. He closed his eyes and held his breath, his expression already depicting pain. But when he never felt her fist come into contact with his flesh, he dared opening one eye to witness her whispering,

"Sorry!" He breathed out a sigh of extreme relief.

"My God, woman! Don't ever do that again."

"That's what you get for embarrassing me." She looked down at her feet sheepishly, taming the current flirtatious vibe coming off of them.

"I'm almost done, I promise. You wanna know when I find you the most attractive?" She muttered a sincere and barely audible "no", really wishing he would just quit, as well as realizing that preventing his mind from speaking its truth was a losing battle.

"Like this, with your comfy clothes on, your lose and messy curls in your face. And those sparkling blue eyes I wish were looking at me right now like I hold the moon." Her head shot up at the confession and deciding she had to take the upper hand once and for all, she told him,

"Slow down lover boy, aren't you being a little overconfident here?" She turned around to hide from him, half-amused by their banter, half-surprised at how quick things were turning around for them.

"Where have you spent your week again?" He asked jokingly, wanting to prove a point. He tugged at her hand, compelling her to face his mischievous eyes.

"Here, with your brother." She retorted sneakily, unable to hide her pride at her repartee.

"Ouch." He mimicked a hurtful expression, conceding in letting her have the last word.

Her smile was starting to be replaced by a more solemn expression as she declared,

"But thank you for saying all of these really nice things about me." He kissed the back of her hand quickly, letting her know complimenting her was an effortless thing to do.

"You don't know how scared I've been this past week." He had shifty eyes now presently, wondering when this conversation would come whilst dreading it altogether, grasping that he wasn't allowed to utter a single from now on, unless he was invited to. He ought to give her the space to let her vent.

"At first I was really mad at you, for putting yourself in this position without thinking of your collateral damage."

When he had not been responding to calls and they all became alert on his disappearance, she had felt really stupid for being in the dark. And infuriated with him for keeping everything close to the vest. That was not how they operated as partners, friends or anything. She had felt tremendous guilt for not having pushed harder for him to let Angela and Bobby work their tragedy on their own terms. The minute she had been outside that baseball field, observing him in her car, she should have pestered him for being out of line instead of encouraging him to "do what he gotta do" once they had stepped into the fresh crime scene. If only the past could be rewritten... occasionally.

"But then, that's your most attractive trait. That's what I admire most in you: your devotion and compassion." He offered her a slight smile, appreciating the compliment in return. Well, given what he envisioned her current train of thoughts to be, he hoped it was still a compliment.

"Until I had to contemplate, even if I strongly kept away from it, the thought of losing you. It all became unbearable." That's when he closed his eyes and avoided hers at all costs. He had not given it a second thought: how putting himself in danger - even when he didn't know it at the time - could so deeply affect her.

"All for what? A woman who'll forever hold you responsible for her husband's death." He opened his mouth to defend convictions but she never gave him the opportunity to do so as she continued,

"But you listen carefully now. No joking around, no beating around the bush. I know the job alright, I know the risks we take and I understand them. But this -" She said pointing to his injury, "This has nothing to do with the job. And you can't ever, put me through this kind of shit ever again. I won't handle it. Do you understand that?"

Her menacing tone threw him off and the grave look she was now sporting testified on the seriousness of her request. Her eyes were defying him not to consent. Intimidated but not knowing what to respond yet, he was pondering whether or not he could keep such a promise. Meanwhile, annoyed by his quietness, she reiterated her forceful demand,

"Do you, Jay?"

"And if I can't pinky promise you that?" He said holding up his little finger, unsuccessful at making light of the tense atmosphere. She pushed it out of the way, exasperated. This was anything but a joke.

"What do you mean you can't promise me that!?"

"I followed my heart and I'd do it again, even given the circumstances."

"Then I guess as a partner and a _friend_-" She put emphasis on this last word, making him aware of what his stubborn behavior would cost him if he did not learn to separate his personal and professional spheres, "I'll have to deal with your reckless behavior."

"What I can promise though," He interjected, with every intention of establishing he was not always an insensitive risk-taker, "is to always put you first." He finished, using that soft and smooth tone only reserved for her. He extended his right arm towards her, encouraging her to come by his side once again.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Perplexed, she still did not have the heart to deny him as it was melting, she walked back, taking his offering hand in hers.

"I'm sorry for putting you through all this mess." His unilateral analysis of the situation was irritating her and she wanted to clarify what he was missing to perceive,

"Mess isn't the word I'd choose Jay. Given your reaction, you clearly have no clue what it was like. People asking me questions they assumed, as your partner, I'd have the answers to when I was in the dark just like them. Searching for leads, clues that would eventually put us to dead ends. The hours passing and not knowing if you'd still be alive. And then when I finally get to you, taking mental notes of your injuries for me to, just a few minutes later, hear this gunshot I knew was meant for you. You have no idea what a _mess_ it really was!"

She had cried so many tears this past week that what was left of them remained the anger. The latter surfacing was unexpected, taking her off guard. She came to the conclusion that being resilient in addition to accepting had been more of a defense mechanism, having cost her more energy than she had foreseen. All she was in desperate need of was his reassurance, to get past the anger and finally get to the place where they could, definitively, put all the chaos stemming from the Markus West ordeal behind them. He was failing to do just that. Or so she thought.

Sensing her mind wandering off to questioning whether she could trust his judgement when his responsibility or empathy would be put to the test in the future, he was itching to let her recognize that nothing proficient would emerge of lamenting on attempting to make Angela's loss less agonizing. There was nothing else to do but to move on. To better things and better choices. On account of this he finally admitted,

"When I get out of here, I want us to properly clarify where we stand. We can then set some rules, on and off duty. But where I stand _now_ is that you are the most important thing in my life. And you don't want to hurt the most important part of you. So I'll be more careful, I won't make a move without your consent."

He sensed her decompress at his confession and as she caressed his cheek, leaning down to kiss his forehead, he uncovered to be done tergiversating and standing alone in this. He had a partner in what appeared to be, all senses of the word. If one more reckless decision was to deprive him of the love of his life, it would never be worth the jeopardy.

Hailey had saved him. Once more, in every sense of the word. It was time to be wiser together, with starting living life to the fullest. With her. For her. Forever.


End file.
